Mother Hearts

How does a mother hold her heart together, when her heart is scattered? When her heart is in six different places all at the same time?

Twenty years ago ... overflowing hearts of joy at the birth of baby #6, our youngest son ...

I read a quote years ago ... Being a mother "is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." (Elizabeth Stone)

Wandering and in many places, my mother-heart is constantly needing to be gathered up, to be held, to be gently brought back together. Which is why I need to learn over and over, day after day, to continually run to my Maker, the one who fashioned my heart, the one I desperately need to hold this scattered heart together.

And it is a life-time of running to My Father. My children are all grown now, and my heart continues to walk around with them.

Walking around outside my body, for 37 years now ... walking around with my six children. Places like Taiwan, Macau, Japan, the Philippines (missions trips three of our daughters went on) ... in places of wandering and tears when there was discord ... in the carefree play of childhood ... in waiting rooms and hospital rooms for appendicitis, leukemia, bone marrow transplant ... on school grounds and in school rooms, sometimes in locker rooms hearing unkind words ... with a son, off to New York City, living in the middle of Manhattan while attending design school ... with four daughters as they labored to bring their own babies into the world (one who labored for many years, through tears, until her two were placed in her arms through adoption).

And now, in this year 2011 ... my heart will be on a big company fishing vessel off the coast of Alaska and up into the Bering Sea. In my heart, I'll be there for three months with my youngest son, who is made for drama and adventure, who has taken on this job of adventure to earn money for his future, bigger dreams of adventure.

And in all these places, and in all these years ... as mothers, we encourage, we love, we pray for, and we let go ... while our hearts continue to walk around with our children.

This is the way of mothers. And in the midst of this walking around, and letting go, we must hold on tight. To the One who is all-powerful, all-knowing, everywhere present ... always with our children, and always with us.

In the early morning hours, I hear these words ...

"Always be full of joy in the Lord.

 I say it again - rejoice! ... 

Don't worry about anything,

 instead, pray about everything. 

Tell God what you need 

and thank Him for all He has done. 

Then you will experience God's peace 

which exceeds anything we can understand. 

His peace will guard your hearts and minds 

as you live in Christ Jesus." 

(Philippians 4:4-7)

In the midst of a sometimes fragmented heart, scattered and in many different places, and mingled in with the tears that come with motherhood ... I can have Joy, and I can have Peace, and so much more. All a gift from the one who fashioned my mother-heart. All that I long for.

"And because we are His children, 

God has sent the Spirit of His Son 

into our hearts, 

prompting us to call out, 'Abba, Father.'" 

(Galatians 4:6)

Within me, in my heart, holding me together, giving me true, overflowing Joy, giving me Peace.

Loving Lord, thank You for the priceless gift of children, and thank You for Joy, and for Peace, and for holding this heart together ... 


Linked to Faith Barista, Imperfect Prose

Linking up at A Pause in the Path, sharing a favorite post from 2011